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abuse

“I worried that my body would cringe when touched. Every foreign fingerprint on my skin belonged to trespassers.”

— Bianca Bowers, Death and Life, Share via Whatsapp

“Liars, cheaters and abusers don t easily change.”

— Jyoti Patel, Share via Whatsapp

“Je n allume plus jamais ce poste recouvert d un plastique jaune que l on m apporté avec une fausse magnanimité. J ai trop peur de saisir cette voix chaude et tendre, trop peur de l imaginer derrière les murs gris de cet hôpital sinistre.”

— Valérie Valère, Le Pavillon des enfants fous, Share via Whatsapp

“If someone asks you how you are, you are meant to say FINE. You are not meant to say that you cried yourself to sleep last night because you hadn t spoken to another person for two consecutive days. FINE is what you say.”

— Gail Honeyman, Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine, Share via Whatsapp

“There a a phrase, the elephant in the living room , which purports to describe what it s like to live with a drug addict, an alcoholic, an abuser. People outside such relationships will sometimes ask, How could you let such a business go on for so many years? Didn t you see the elephant in the living room? And it s so hard for anyone living in a more normal situation to understand the answer that comes closest to the truth; I m sorry, but it was there when I moved in. I didn t know it was an elephant; I thought it was part of the furniture. There comes an aha-moment for some folks - the lucky ones - when they suddenly recognize the difference.”

— Stephen King, Share via Whatsapp

“... you don t have to wait for someone to treat you bad repeatedly. All it takes is once, and if they get away with it that once, if they know they can treat you like that, then it sets the pattern for the future.”

— Jane Green, Bookends, Share via Whatsapp

“YOUR ABUSIVE PARTNER DOESN’T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH HIS ANGER; HE HAS A PROBLEM WITH YOUR ANGER. One of the basic human rights he takes away from you is the right to be angry with him. No matter how badly he treats you, he believes that your voice shouldn’t rise and your blood shouldn’t boil. The privilege of rage is reserved for him alone. When your anger does jump out of you—as will happen to any abused woman from time to time—he is likely to try to jam it back down your throat as quickly as he can. Then he uses your anger against you to prove what an irrational person you are. Abuse can make you feel straitjacketed. You may develop physical or emotional reactions to swallowing your anger, such as depression, nightmares, emotional numbing, or eating and sleeping problems, which your partner may use as an excuse to belittle you further or make you feel crazy.”

— Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men, Share via Whatsapp

“This isn t a romance. You re not a damsel in distress and I m not the handsome prince come to save you.”

— CJ Roberts, Captive in the Dark, Share via Whatsapp

“In order to escape accountability for his crimes, the perpetrator does everything in his power to promote forgetting. If secrecy fails, the perpetrator attacks the credibility of his victim. If he cannot silence her absolutely, he tries to make sure no one listens.”

— Judith Lewis Herman, Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror, Share via Whatsapp

“As long as you keep secrets and suppress information, you are fundamentally at war with yourself…The critical issue is allowing yourself to know what you know. That takes an enormous amount of courage.”

— Bessel A. van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, Share via Whatsapp

“Has he ever trapped you in a room and not let you out? Has he ever raised a fist as if he were going to hit you? Has he ever thrown an object that hit you or nearly did? Has he ever held you down or grabbed you to restrain you? Has he ever shoved, poked, or grabbed you? Has he ever threatened to hurt you? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then we can stop wondering whether he’ll ever be violent; he already has been.”

— Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men, Share via Whatsapp

“God wants you to be delivered from what you have done and from what has been done to you - Both are equally imporant to Him.”

— Joyce Meyer, Beauty for Ashes: Receiving Emotional Healing, Share via Whatsapp

“You can only hurt a woman so many times before her fangs grow sharp, her claws scratch deep, and her eyes become blades.”

— Melody Lee, Moon Gypsy, Share via Whatsapp

“Why isn t there a commandment to honor thy children or at least one to not abuse thy children ? The notion that we must honor our parents causes many people to bury their real feelings and set aside their own needs in order to have a relationship with people they would otherwise not associate with. Parents, like anyone else, need to earn respect and honor, and honoring parents who are negative and abusive is not only impossible but extremely self-abusive. Perhaps, as with anything else, honoring our parents starts with honoring ourselves. For many adult children, honoring themselves means not having anything to do with one or both of their parents.”

— Beverly Engel, Divorcing a Parent, Share via Whatsapp

“I ve heard that people stand in bad situations because a relationship like that gets turned up by degrees. It is said that a frog will jump out of a pot of boiling water. Place him in a pot and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death. Us frogs understand this.”

— Deb Caletti, Stay, Share via Whatsapp

“Most people have no imagination. If they could imagine the sufferings of others, they would not make them suffer so.”

— Anna Funder, All That I Am, Share via Whatsapp

“A man with a club [bat] is a law-maker, a man to be obeyed, but not necessarily conciliated.”

— Jack London, The Call of the Wild, Share via Whatsapp