“Mr. Right is usually two or eight men.”
“A tomboy is a bisexual girl’s dream lover.”
“Be ashamed not of being single, or, unemployed. That comes standard.”
“To a man, a woman is fun to be with … until she gains weight. To a woman, a man is fun to live with … until he loses his job.”
“Some marry because they are in love. Others marry to have sex ... without the guilt.”
“88% of women love making their first love making incident with a man seem like an accident.”
“Generally, a woman would rather be married to any man that she doesn’t hate, than remain unmarried to a man that she loves.”
“Dating is a man-made ideology: if having a lover was a prerequisite to living, one would either be in a relationship, or, six feet under.”
“There’s a correlation between the number of digits on a man’s bank balance, and, the number of things that his woman is willing to forgive him for.”
“When ready to settle down: women are more interested in where the man is going; men are more interested in where the woman has been.”
“Dating a wo/man with a child is adoption … without the paperwork.”
“A good man is a male creature that survives the endless episodes that its woman spends complaining about women who she hates, and, women who hate her.”
“Men marry for the womb. Women marry for their tummy.”
“A wedding is a ceremony men fund with money they know they don’t have … to prove the love they think they have.”
“Most people can’t stand spending a few minutes by themself. Yet they expect others to spend an hour, a day, or, even a lifetime, with them.”
“There is a correlation between one’s estimation of the odds of finding a new lover who is, at the least, of the same standard as they one they’re currently in a dead relationship with, and, their attempting to revive a dead relationship.”
“Some couples are married because they fell in love. Some are married because the woman fell pregnant.”