“It wasn t like there was a dating and mating website for bear shifters. If there had been, its mascot would have been that yellow Care Bear with the heart on its stomach.”
“Your Life Doesn’t Need A Happily-Ever-After To Be A Damn Good Story”
“Paeng leans back and rests his hand flat on the table. “Vince.” Blushing, he snaps at his friend. “I dropped the bra on the wet tarp and I guess I must have accidentally gotten paint on it and touched it to my cheek, okay?” Paeng is silent as Vince sighs. “I didn’t mean to take my upset out on you, sorry.” “No big. So, you fondled it. Was it good for you?” Paeng’s eyes glitter, making Vince’s anxiety flare. “I couldn’t help myself! The girl’s smoking hot and yet she doesn’t appear to own trashy underwear.” He feels all dreamy just thinking about it. “It’s simple and soft . . . it felt so nice. She’s not like any of the girls I’ve met before. She’s direct, feisty and artistic and I bet she’s really smart. She’s nothing like the usual MOM Girl and she’s not even my type. But her underwear is beautiful. She doesn’t wear slutty underwear because she doesn’t put on airs, and oh, God, that’s so attractive. What I wouldn’t give to see—” Paeng face palms Vince. “Dude. You are waxing poetic about cotton underwear like my sisters wear when they get their periods. It’s just underwear. It is not the key to Dani’s psyche. You are making the kind of assumptions about her that lead to expensive rings, one point two kids, and minivans. You are in trouble.”
“I m surprised I could actually talk with how much I was grinning.”
“I think you re something wonderful.”
“He s got more red flags than Soviet Russia.”
“In my dating career, I had found that mothers seemed to like me; fathers did not. Period. So I tended to avoid contact with the dads. I assumed that this wasn t personal. Rather, it was simply the fact that I was a hormone-laden, male teenager with a fully functional penis, who happened to be in the presence of their daughters.”
“I used to think I was in love with Mia because she was in love with me. Now when I watch her strutting down the runway, twisting and flouncing the way her mother trained her, I know she s just a human coat hanger. A wired body I hold late at night and try to fit into.”
“Dr. Morris believes, and I strongly agree, that couples are most likely to bond securely when they have not rushed the dating experience. Time is the critical ingredient.”
“It s SO much worse in high school! People talk about who s dating with such GRAVITY, like they re talking about wikileaks.”
“It s funny how they thought we were dating, Colin said, glancing over at her. How s that funny? she asked, holding his gaze. Um, he said. Distracted from the road, Colin watched as she gave him the slightest version of her inimitable smile.”
“Describing our romantic longings in Life preserves, therapist Harriet Lerner shares that most people want a partner who is mature and intelligent, loyal and trustworthy, loving and attentive, sensitive and open, kind and nurturant, competent and responsible. No matter the intensity of this desire, she concludes: Few of us evaluate a prospective partner with the same objectivity and clarity that we might use to select a household appliance or a car. To be capable of critically evaluating a partner we would need to be able to stand back and look critically at ourselves, at our needs, desires, and longings..... We fear that evaluating our needs and then carefully choosing partners will reveal that there is no one for us to love. Most of us prefer to have a partner who is lacking then no partner at all. What becomes apparent is that we may be more interested in finding a partner than in knowing love.”
“Always wanted a girl with a heart-shaped ass. Most of my exes have ass-shaped hearts.”
“When you least expect it is when the person you always dreamt of will finally show up.”
“Bob leaned back and straightened his red paisley power tie. His smile was a bit lopsided and more than a bit suggestive. “In my experience, older women have very definite ideas about what they want—ideas that don’t include wheezing, potbellied, middle-aged guys with receding hairlines.” He chuckled and smoothed his flaxen tresses once more. She drummed her fingernails on the white tablecloth and looked for the waitress. That made six times so far this insolent pup had used the term “older women.” He gave her the once-over. “Nowadays, older women are so—” God help him if he says... “—well preserved.” Lina briefly closed her eyes. It was going to be a long evening.”
“It wasn’t really acceptable to be single for more than a week, two tops, if you were cool in junior high.”
“We had been texting for exactly thirteen minutes, asking random questions, trying to figure out if we knew any of the same people, or if we liked the same kind of music--the usual interview process you go through when you re trying to get the job as boyfriend.”