“When she opened her eyes, she was both in her body and watching it, nowhere near the cavity of the tree. The Blue that was before her stood inches from a boy in an Aglionby sweater. There was a slight stoop to his posture, and his shoulders were spattered darkly with rain. It was his fingers that Blue felt on her face. He touched her cheek with the backs of his fingers. Tears coursed down the other Blue s face. Though some strange magic, Blue could feel them on her face as well. She could feel, too, sick, rising misery she d felt in the churchyard, the grief that felt bigger than her. The other Blue s tears seemed endless. One drop slid after another, each following an identical path down her cheeks. The boy in the Aglionby sweater leaned his forehead against Blue s. She felt the pressure of his skin against hers, and suddenly she could smell mint. It ll be okay. Gansey told the other Blue. She could tell that he was afraid. It ll be okay. Impossibly, Blue realized that this other Blue was crying because she loved Gansey. And that the reason Gansey touched her like that, his fingers so careful with her, was because he knew that her kiss could kill him. She could feel how badly the other Blue wanted to kiss him, even as she dreaded it. Though she couldn t understand why, her real, present day memories in the tree cavity were clouded with other false memories of their lips nearly touching, a life this other Blue had already lived. Okay, I m ready- Gansey s voice caught, just a little. Blue, kiss me.”
“I choose you, he said very softly, Max. Then his hard, rough hand tenderly cuppoed my chin, and suddenly his mouth was on mine, and every synapse in my brain shorted out. We had kissed a couple of times before, but this was different. This time, I squelched my immediate, overwhelming desire to run away screaming. I closed my eyes and put my arms around him despite my fear. Then somehow we slid sideways so we were lying in the cool sand. I was holding him fiercely, and he was kissing me fiercely, and it was...just so, so intensely good. Once I got past my usual, gut-wrenching terror, there was a long, sweet slide into mindlessness, when all I felt was Fang, and all I heard was his breathing, and all I could think was Oh, God, I want to do this all the time.”
“O, here Will I set up my everlasting rest, And shake the yoke of inauspicious stars From this world-wearied flesh. Eyes, look your last! Arms, take your last embrace! and, lips, O you The doors of breath, seal with a righteous kiss A dateless bargain to engrossing death!”
“I settled on the floor and whispered to Sam, “I want you to listen to me, if you can.” I leaned the side of my face against his ruff and remembered the golden wood he had shown me so long ago. I remembered the way the yellow leaves, the color of Sam’s eyes, fluttered and twisted, crashing butterflies, on their way to the ground. The slender white trunks of the birches, creamy and smooth as human skin. I remembered Sam standing in the middle of the wood, his arms stretched out, a dark, solid form in the dream of the trees. His coming to me, me punching his chest, the soft kiss. I remembered every kiss we’d ever had, and I remembered every time I’d curled in his human arms. I remembered the soft warmth of his breath on the back of my neck while we slept. I remembered Sam.”
“Sean reaches between us and slides a thin bracelet of red ribbons over my free hand. Lifting my arm, he presses his lips against the inside of my wrist. I m utterly still; I feel my pulse tap several times against his lips, and then he releases my hand. For luck, he says. He takes Dove s lead from me. Sean, I say, and he turns. I take his chin and kiss his lips, hard. I m reminded, all of a sudden, of that first day on the beach, when I pulled his head from the water. For luck, I say to his startled face.”
“I will find you. In the farthest corner, I will find you.”
“He’s dozed off again, but I kiss him awake, which seems to startle him. Then he smiles as if he’d be happy to lie there gazing at me forever.”
“His noise is getting quieter, but I can still see it there still- See how he feels the skin of my hand against his, see how he wants to take it and press it against his mouth, how he wants to breathe in the smell of me and how beautiful I look to him, how strong after all that illness, and how he wants to just lightly touch my neck, just there, and how he wants to take me in his arms and- Oh, God, he says, looking away suddenly. Viola, I m sorry, I didn t mean- But I just put my hand to the back of his neck- And he says, Viola-? And I pull myself towards him- And I kiss him. And it feels like, finally.”
“Well, it s either kiss me or kill me, that s how I see it.”
“Earthquakes just happen. Tornadoes just happen. Your tongue does not just happen to fall into some other girls mouth!”
“And yet to wine, to opium even, I prefer the elixir of your lips on which love flaunts itself; and in the wasteland of desire your eyes afford the wells to slake my thirst.”
“Before I could lose my courage, I said, Don t I get a kiss for luck? It s kind of a tradition, right? I figured she would punch me. Instead, she drew her knife and stared at the army marching toward us. Come back alive, Seaweed Brain. Then, we ll see.”
“A kiss may ruin a human life”
“Then come here, he said, a bit redundantly, as he had already pulled her with him into an armchair and curled her up in his arms. Tell me what I can do to help you feel better. Fire looked into his quiet eyes, touched his dear, familiar face, and considered the question. Well. I always like when you kiss me. Do you? You re good at it. Well, he said. That s lucky, because I ll always be kissing you.”
“They were kissing. Put like that, and you could be forgiven for presuming that this was a normal kiss, all lips and skin and possibly even a little tongue. You d miss how he smiled, how his eyes glowed. And then, after the kiss was done, how he stood, like a man who had just discovered the art of standing and had figured out how to do it better than anyone else who would ever come along.”
“Kiss me until I forget how terrified I am of everything wrong with my life.”
“This is the part where I kiss you.”