“You could start a fire with the heat between you two. You re mistaking bitter animosity for heartfelt affection.”
“In my rush, I hadn’t tied my shoelaces. Noah was now tying them for me. He looked up at me through his dark fringe of lashes and smiled. The expression on his face melted me completely. I knew I had the goofiest grin plastered on my lips, and didn’t care. “There,” he said as he finished tying the laces on my left shoe. “Now you won’t fall.” Too late.”
“Is there any point asking what you re going to make me do on Sunday? Not really. Okay. Is there any point asking what you re going to do to me? He grinned wickedly. Not really. Fabulous. Does it involve the use of a safe word? That will depend entirely on you. Noah moved impossibly closer, just inches away. A few freckles disappeared into the scruff on his jaw. I ll be gentle, Noah added. My breath caught in my throat as he looked at me from beneath those lashes, ruining me. I narrowed my eyes at him. You re evil. In response, Noah smiled, and raised his finger to gently tap the tip of my nose. And you re mine, he said, then walked away.”
“I hate you, I muttered. Noah smiled wider. I know.”
“You smell good, he whispered into my neck. He was warm against me. Instinctively, I arched back into him and smiled. Really? Mmm-hmm. Delicious. Like bacon.”
“I was going to kiss him, and I was going to regret it. But at that moment, I couldn t bring myself to care.”
“I was warned about you, you know. And with that half-smile that wrecked me, Noah said, But you re here anyway.”
“Once upon a time, a girl had a father, a prince, a society of friends. Then they betrayed her, so she destroyed them all.”
“It s not about surviving. It should be about love. When you know love...that s what makes this life worth it. When you live with it everyday. Wake up with it, hold on to it during the thunder and after a nightmare. When love is your refuge from the death that surrounds us all and when it fills you so tight that you can t express it.”
“Sometimes I think gravity may be death in disguise. Other times I think gravity is love, which is why love s only demand is that we fall.”
“Every teenager in the world feels like that, feels broken or out of place, different somehow, royalty mistakenly born into a family of peasants. The difference in your case is that it s true.”
“Have you made any other friends since we ve been here? I gave him the death stare. Yes, actually. Who? I want a name. Jamie Roth. The Ebola kid? I heard he s a little unstable. That was one incident.”
“It s not fair. It s not fair that he lets his rage take over, that he lets it rule him. I don t know why he has to let it rule him. I don t know why he has to be two people. I don t know why he gets to be two people, and I only get to be me, the one who is here to take what he has to give, and who is here to pick pu the pieces afterward.”
“Noah s eyes held my face. I swallowed hard. The juxtaposition of him sitting in a room full of people while staring at no one but me was overwhelming. Something shifted inside of me at the intimacy of us, eyes locked amid the scraping of twenty graphite pencils on paper. I shaded his face out of nothingness. I smudged the slope of his neck and darkened his delinquent mouth, while the lights accented the right angle of his jaw against the cloudy sky outside. I did not hear the bell. I did not hear the other students rise and leave the room. I did not even notice that Noah no longer sat at the stool.”
“Wow,” said Adrian. He sat down on the bed and tested its bounciness, giving it a nod of approval. “This is amazing. What do you think, buttercup?” “I have no words,” I said honestly. He patted the spot beside him. “Want to try it out?”
“How long will I live my life afraid of what-ifs?”
“I have a theory that the answers to all of life s major questions can found in a John Mayer song.”