“It s better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt”
“I picked up one of the books and flipped through it. Don t get me wrong, I like reading. But some books should come with warning labels: Caution: contains characters and plots guaranteed to induce sleepiness. Do not attempt to operate heavy machinery after ingesting more than one chapter. Has been known to cause blindness, seizures and a terminal loathing of literature. Should only be taken under the supervision of a highly trained English teacher. Preferably one who grades on the curve.”
“Breeze strolled over to the table and chose a seat with his characteristic decorum. The portly man raised his dueling cane, pointing it at Ham. I see that my period of intellectual respite has come to an end. Ham smiled. I thought up a couple beastly questions while I was gone, and I ve been saving them just for you, Breeze. I m dying of anticipation, Breeze said. He turned his cane toward Lestibournes. Spook, drink. Spook rushed over and fetched Breeze a cup of wine. He s such a fine lad, Breeze noted, accepting the drink. I barely even have to nudge him Allomantically. If only the rest of you ruffians were so accommodating. Spook frowned. Niceing the not on the playing without. I have no idea what you just said, child, Breeze said. So I m simply going to pretend it was coherent, then move on. Kelsier rolled his eyes. Losing the stress on the nip, he said. Notting without the needing of care. Riding the rile of the rids to the right, Spook said with a nod. What are you two babbling about? Breeze said testily. Wasing the was of brightness, Spook said. Nip the having of wishing of this. Ever wasing the doing of this, Kelsier agreed. Ever wasing the wish of having the have, Ham added with a smile. Brighting the wish of wasing the not. Breeze turned to Dockson with exasperation. I believe our companions have finally lost their minds, dear friend. Dockson shrugged. Then, with a perfectly straight face, he said, Wasing not of wasing is.”
“He [Iggy] started reaching for things around the table, and his hand landed on Total. “You’re black.” “I prefer canine-American,” said Total.”
“Maybe you ll win when hell freezes over. He raised an eyebrow. That could be easily arranged.”
“Dean: If there is a greater power, why is it he can t get you a new sweater? Jamie: Because, he s too busy looking for your brain.”
“I don t necessarily agree with everything that I say.”
“Bones didn’t share any of my qualms about suddenly holding an arm that wasn’t attached to a body anymore. He just grabbed the ghoul by his other arm and began thumping him over the head with the loose limb. I’d heard Bones threaten to beat someone with their own limb before, but I’d always assumed that was a figure of speech. Apparently not.”
“I tried to explain as much as I could, Poppet says. I think I made an analogy about cake. Well, that must have worked, Widget says. Who doesn t like a good cake analogy?”
“Why does everything have to be so hard? [Eragon] wondered. Because, said Saphira, everyone wants to eat, but no one wants to be eaten.”
“Looking out of the window at the infinite sky, I prayed out, Dear Baby Jesus, I am sorry for my sin, even though I do not know what they are, which seems a bit unfair if it is going to be held against me. But that is your way. And I am not questioning your wisdomosity. In future, however, would it be possible for my life to be not so entirely crap? Thank you.”